Malaysia

Palah, Nazi and SemiValu were patrolling in a helicopter :
Semi : 'if I drop a thousand-note from here, the person that picks it up must be very happy'
Nazi : 'if I throw 2 five hundred-notes down, it will make 2 person happy'
Palah : 'if I drop 10 one hundred-note, there will be 10 happy person'
The pilot murmuring to himself : 'why don't all of you just jump down from here, that makes 23 million Malaysians happy'.

Midnight, Nazi went for supper and bump into a robber : 'give me all your money!!'
Nazi was very angry : 'I am the honorable Deputy Prime Minister! Better behave yourself'
Robber :' well, then … return all my money'

One fine day, PM and parliament members were on the way to a meeting where they all crashed into an accident and being rushed to the hospital. The reporters were at the hospital, the doctor shook his head 'we have done our best to rescue the PM but …'
Reporters:'how about Nazi?'
Doctor:'we were unable to rescue him either …'
Reporters:'who have you saved?'
The doctor was excited:' Malaysia is saved (has a hope) now'

SemiValu visited the psychiatric hospital. All the patients hurray for him but there is one patient who ignored SemiV.
SemiV : 'why is he not welcoming my arrival?' 'he is normal (not insane) today' say the doctor.

SemiValu had an accident when he was on his way to a village for election campaign. A farmer saw and rushed to the scene but all the passengers were dead. He buried all the passengers (politicians).
Few days later, the police in charge found the farmer and asked where all the politicians were, 'have they all died?'
Farmer : ' hmmm, SemiValu was screaming that he is still alive when I bury him ….'
Police : ' why you buried him anyway?'
Farmer : 'because SemiValu never tells the truth'.

Legend has it that George Washington, America's first president,
chopped down a cherry tree in his youth. The story goes that George
gives the tree a good swing and chops it down with an axe. His father
sees the damaged tree and asks his son if he knows who did the deed.
George is quoted bravely admitting the truth:
'I can't tell a lie, Pa; you know I can't tell a lie. I did cut it
with my axe.'

Below is a satire of how some Malaysian politicians may
have reacted to the question:

Badawi - 'I did not cut down the tree , I was just
taking a nap underneath it.'
Najib - 'I swear that I have never MET that tree.'
Hishamuddin - '...but I only own a keris ,not axe, how to
cut down the tree?'
Mahathir  - 'Apa nama cherry tree, yes, I chopped it down
because, I don't like the idea of Pak lah sleeping under it.'
Chua - 'Yes it was me, I resign as caretaker of this orchard.'
Lingam - 'It could be me, it might have been me but I don't think
its me.'
Anwar - 'I did NOT do it, and I am not giving any DNA sample
for you to plant on the axe handle.'
Toyo - 'The new state government should just trim the grass
and not waste time asking who cut the tree.'
Ahmad ( Terengganu MB ) - 'I chopped it because cherry trees are
more expensive to maintain than durian trees.'
Azalina - 'The cherry tree is not included under my tourism MOU
so I cut it down and besides there were unauthorised signboards put up
around the tree.'
Lim KS - "cherry tree you also don't know, you are an insult to Oxford"
Karpa - "The big foot creature did it."
Mokhtar - "The big monkey did it."
Khairy - " I did not do it, neither did the mat rempit. By the way, what 's a cherry tree."
Malaysian citizens - "Oh for heaven sake! Someone please plant somethings before we all starve to death."